Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Family Birthdays


Red Velvet and Chocolate

I'm pretty sure the best thing about being a grad student right now has nothing to do with school. The best thing about it is that I'm back in Denver where my family is. I know, adorable right? Don't swoon over it. Family equals free food. And when it's your birthday and you're on the younger end of the spectrum and everyone's favorite, money. Every few months my mom's side has a gathering at the house of whoever's turn it is, where we lump everyone's birthdays together and eat lots of chips and dip and cake and ice cream. This was the first time I've been in the state for my birthday since '03, and I realized I seriously missed family birthdays.

Okay, I admit, it was last Sunday and I've been slow to post. BUT, keep in mind I have to read 69.4 billion pages per week for school, and the only reason I'm doing it right now is because I am PROcrastinating. See what I did there? It's because I'm a pro at it. Anyway, as an avid reader of this site, I'm sure you will recall my mentioning of how food is always somehow involved in life's events. Case in point right here. I think eating together makes it an official celebratory gathering or something (like, if you didn't eat it would be one of those awkward "drop-by" visits with an ulterior motive where you ask for money or something). Of course, food presence is always okay. I like eating.

My brother, Terry, is pretty talented at food preparation (and will be getting a post of his own next time I don't feel like reading about Karl von Clausewitz or whatever) and in this instance he mushed together some meat and grilled it. I don't know exactly what was in his hamburgers, as I was looking for beer while he was mixing them, but I can tell you what the best hamburgers always have: diced onion, Worcestershire sauce, and bread crumbs. And seasoning to one's liking. The onion, well, I don't know what it does besides make it taste good. The Worcestershire hooks up that umami-ness and is classically paired with beef. The bread crumbs are, of course, debatable. They might seem a little unusual in a hamburger, since it's not meatloaf/balls, but they help prevent the hamburgers from shrinking because they absorb the juice that would otherwise be lost in the flames. And since a good hamburger is only 73-80% lean, there's a lot of triglyceride goodness to save. And they make the meat go a little further, which is helpful when you're feeding several Americans.

Flame-broilin'
My Aunt Val made Deviled Eggs, which I thought were reserved only for Christmas, but apparently my birthday, like Jesus's, is worthy. If you don't how to make them, it's pretty simple. Just hard-boil some eggs, peel them and cut them in half. Take out the yolks, mash them up with some mayonnaise, which incidentally is made from egg yolks and oil, and spoon the mixture back into the egg whites. Sprinkle some paprika on top, put them in your specialized deviled egg holder you got for your wedding in '82 and, BOOM, you got deviled eggs. Your heart will thank you later. By stopping. But it's worth it!

There's word-play involving deviled and heavenly in here somewhere
At this point, a dilemma. We have dogs and burgers getting cooked, and a limited number of deviled eggs, so what are we going to stuff our faces with in the meantime? CHIPS AND DIP!!! Pretty much my favorite thing ever invented, and I have had many a dinner comprised solely of Mission Tortilla Triangles and Herdez Medium. Since this was a special occasion, we had a few options. I kind of ignored the salsa and Tostito's Neon Green PowerBait because I was really feeling this ranch-flavored dip we had. It's pretty much just mayonnaise and ranch dressing mix, which come to think of it is just ranch dressing. In any case, it's delicious, not to mention classy. Throw in some Ruffles Ridges and it's like you're at a debutante ball in Newport. Or...a shotgun wedding in Huntsville. Delicious.

I swear to God I don't know how those books got there
Okay, so we've had our satisfaction in hors d'oeuvres, time for the real deal. I don't know who made this squash casserole, but it had vegetables in it so I know it was an in-law. It was good though. It was a mix of summer squash and zucchini on the inside and some butternut squash grated on top. With other stuff. I'm sorry, I know this post is extra lazy but I didn't make any of this stuff so I don't know the logistics of it all.


My cousin Mary made some beans. I figured after the deviled eggs earlier I might was well partake, it's not like anybody would be surprised at the gastro-repercussions of this veritable feast. It was a mix of cannellini, kidney, garbanzo and black beans. Maybe some others. She put them in a slow cooker with lamb, just in case somebody "don't eat a-no meat" (name that movie I'm ashamed I'm quoting). The lamb was really amazing, tender and flavorful in there. Kudos, Mary, for having the fanciest dish. Your prize: a spot on the couch during the Broncos game.


Put it all together on disposable dishware, grab your Sprite and some corn on the cob, and you, my friend, are full-- until it's time for cake and ice cream. But I'm only 24 now, so it's okay. Fat later.


Also: look how adorable my dog is. I don't give him people food, but that doesn't fly with the rest of the clan so he had, like, way too many carbs.

Gramma Kassel is not interested in your puppy eyes

And thanks to Allyssa (not pictured) and Terry for food at their house. And Aunt Val (not pictured) and Uncle John for food at Texas Roadhouse the other night.

Uncle John and Terry

4 comments:

  1. Why must we go thru this maze to post a comment?

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  2. My Big Fat Greek Wedding. What do I win? And it is pretty bad that you chose that movie to quote.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow! Some history and research! I think it's time for you to cook us dinner........ Just not naked

    T & A

    ReplyDelete